I had always been guided
By blind optimism
Now my eyes have been opened
To life as it is truly
And I wish with all my soul
That I am taken over by the darkness I see
To drown in the black truth of reality
With light cast over the journey
I see only dead ends
The pursuit of happiness
Seems a fruitless course
When joy will only show itself briefly
Then be buried in further suffering
Is the effort of breathing worth the reward?
My heart already scarred from falls
I plead for a long term slumber
Disappointments, struggles and confusions
Leave wounds that bleed forever internally
With my pulse faint and weaker every day
I pray that when I rest my eyes tonight
Closed is how they will stay.
Charlotte Gardiner - January 2009
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